I am currently finishing my first year of dental hygiene at the College of New Caledonia. People commonly ask me how I like the hygiene program and how it is going so far. My answers are always mixed.
My emotions tend to flip between the feeling of success that accompanies overcoming challenges and feelings of despair that accompanies the overwhelming amount of things to do at all times. With this program you feel like no matter how many times you succeed you are still a failure, no matter how much you accomplish you are still behind. Countless times of crying in the locker room, the car, clinic, bedroom, classroom. Obviously private crying is preferable; but sometimes humiliating public crying occurs dispute my best efforts to avoid it. I have never been a person who fails things in my life. That sounds incredibly stuck up, but it's just true. I am very critical of what success means for my own life and anything less than success is unacceptable. This program is a constant challenge of my own pride and self- identity. We have multiple pass/fail tests per week meant to identify our weaknesses, strengths and areas of improvement. Many of these tests occur after you've seen it once, done it once and now need to be competent. It is a challenge to people who are motivated to succeed but overwhelmed with new information, a busy schedule and constantly feeling emotionally drained.
It is necessary to have competent skills and be able to critically think your way through the process of care for the dental hygiene program but often the program seems unnecessarily demoralizing to the students. It often feels as if many teachers are unnecessarily picky about things that are less important and intentionally make you feel like a failure. Some teachers place more importance on sticking to the to rules than helping you learn and supporting you during your learning process. It is very frustrating to students
Photos by CNC Dental Studies
who feel isolated and depressed instead of being able to use the failure as a learning process. Other teachers seem to have a better focus on facilitating the learning of students and focusing on each failure as an opportunity for improvement instead of a personal inadequacy.
This school year has been a lesson in humility and coping with stress. Everything we learn is new and unnatural and has resulted in a lot of growing pains. Met a lot of great people along the way. Shout out to my hygiene friends, struggling with me, crying with me, raging with along the way.
Prince George has felt suffocating and I am impatiently awaiting the summer.
3 weeks until freedom.
3 weeks until reading books unrelated to teeth.
3 weeks until time to draw and paint and create.
3 weeks until the end of exams.
Excited for hikes and summer and sunshine and greenery.
XOXO KylaChristy
